This past week, I have found myself in a position of serious heartache.
Not the type of heartache you would think, (from a person, relationship..etc) But a heartache for a generation that is content with focusing on ourselves while people all around us silently cry out for help.
In prayer, I am constantly asking God to " break my heart, for the things that breaks his"... And it's been happening. Situations that normally wouldn't re-cross my mind have been on constant replay. I have spent countless nights trying to solve situations that don't really "pertain" me. But I personally feel like it is my responsibility to shine a light on.
Lately, I have spent time trying to come up with this grand ministry plan for my life. Thinking about how I can reach the most amount of people in the shortest time. God brought it to my attention that when I truly seek him and rest in him the plans he has for my life come to me, sometimes when I am paying the least attention. It isn't the quantity of people that I reach but the quality of the relationships I build that ultimately lead people to Christ.
The world defines success so much differently then God does, so when I came up with these visions for "my" life i always felt that it should include a huge pulpit, or some type of flashy lights. For some people that may be their calling, but as for me,God has shown me his plans are quite different from what i imagine. When I laid my plans to the side and stopped trying to come to some sort of compromise with God he showed me right where he wants me.
I've had many life changing encounters in alleys,under bridges, on park benches, and in juvenile detention centers. God has called me to meet people where they are at. Because of this, my heart breaks for hopelessness, my heart breaks for people who feel that they are unloved, and my heart breaks for people who are content in a lifestyle that God would never have wanted for them. These are the things that make cry, these are the things that have people telling me I'm crazy because I'm reaching out to people who don't always reach back. My platform includes cold nights, dangerous situations, many tears, and a heart that breaks daily.
I've learned that being heartbroken isn't bad if your heart is breaking for the right thing. When we are heartbroken we are in a vulnerable place that allows us to humble our selves and love, despite of circumstance,title, or position. In a heartbroken state we won't give up on people even if it means loving from a distance, sleeping on a bench, or telling an inmate that he's forgiven for the most unthinkable crime. It is my prayer that our heart breaks everyday and that we step out of our comfort zones to comfort others.
